Friday, March 20, 2009

Closed off from Love

So much has happened in my life for the past 2 years. All I can say my life was a turmoil and at times it was a constant nightmare for me. But I do thank God for all that has happened in my life because it had made me stronger.

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All those hardships and pains has taught me a lot. Failures in my life has taught me valuable lessons. A recent "fling" because I would not call that a relationship has made me realised some thing. I realised that my past failure relationship has caused so much damaged that finally my heart has been closed off from love. The pain that I felt... I really could not explain. This has also caused me to hurt a number of people. Sometimes I asked myself... am I asking too much from a person? There are only three essential things that fulfill my requirements in a relationship these are...sincerity & Honesty, commitment and love. It seems so hard to find. Sad to say all my relationships never ever lasted a year. I do envy people whose relationships lasted years. But no point crying over spilled milk.

A verse from a song is very much suited to what I feel and what I am right now. It is from Leona Lewis's "Bleeding Love". Here goes "Closed off from love, I don't need the pain". It is true I do not need the pain anymore. All I want to do now is to concentrate on my studies and finish it off and come out and work.

Eventhough deep down in my heart I am missing a person pretty much... but the person is ignoring me. Oh well... that is life isn't it.

A toast to me for my studies. Gambateh to myself.

Cheers
Dwinz 09

4 comments:

Angel Valerie said...

cheer up!

my situation is aint any better than urs because i've totally given up hope on the BIG LOVE game and decided to be on my own for God knows how long - until the day my heart would open again.

i went through hassles and pains and heartaches just to get to where i am today and honest enough, im phobic of relationships already but...

please dont let ur emotions take control of what u're feeling. u've tons n tons of important things to do like getting ur life straight back on the track for once again.

then, i'll get to see the once happy darling Edwin that i love so, so much again.

no matter what, remember, Ed, i'll always and perhaps forever be there if u ever need me.

*hugs, hugs*

Anonymous said...

sincerity & Honesty, commitment and love

count count..
thats 4

u need help, plz look for nth's calculator for 10x accuracy, it's on sale

lone said...

finish off ur studies n u should be fine. dun worry bout other things, just get the best result u can..

no more "messing up" ok

hope to hear great new from u.
god bless~

simply Ed said...

Thanks guys for your support..*HUGS*

NTH ar... your marketing skills are not very good...your product does not appeal to me at all...