July 8, 2008... a mother came up to her son... saddened and disappointed....and here goes the conversation.
Mother: You don't go upstairs, come down here and tell me what do you want.
The son descending the stairs....
Son: Yes?
Mother: Tell me now what is the standing between both of us?
Son: ..... (keeps quiet)
Mother: You have been rebellious and very rebellious and that I do not know how to teach you. You have become very selfish.
Mother: You have never appreciated what I have given you. Your studies... I do not see you putting effort in your studies at all. Look at it now, its the holidays and I do not see you touching your books. Your cousin's has told and has been through uni life and they say you really need to put the effort in your studies but I do not see you putting the effort in it. All my hard earned money has been invested in your studies.
Mother: You treat me like your enemy now. You could never listen to me and what I told or tried to teach you. You are worst than your sister. It has come to a point whereby I told your sister too that I want to disown you. So tell me... what is that you want? Freedom?
Mother: I think I gave you a lot of freedom. If I wanted to control you I could have easily taken the car away from you. But you are living in my house and I am your guardian and there are rules in this house that you will have to abide too. Now... tell me what else do you want? Total freedom? Do things your own way.
Son: Well... to tell he truth I am sick and tired of being blame for things that I have not done. Like the day you forgot your house keys. You put all the blame on me.
Mother: Well... I did not tell you the whole story... that day... when I was locked out... I needed the toilet properly... I had no where to go and I had to relief under the star fruit tree using plastics to block the view. Have you ever thought you would react the same? When.. the time your dad let the dog off and when you came home the dog ran out of the house did you not get into a fit? Did you not blame it on your dad...?
Son:....(keeps quiet again. Seriously, he does not know how to answer)
Mother: If you have put yourself in my shoes and think of it from a parents point of view. You would see things differently. You go out late into the night. When your cousin were your age they do not do that. Well it worries me...since I know how you drive and they are a lot of bad people out there these days.
Mother: Tell me... since we make each other unhappy. Why not let us just go our separate ways. I will disown you. I do not need a son like this.
........
The story ended when the son said no. The mother said that he should change and not be selfish. She kept insisting that she has done so much for her son and her son has never given back anything. The conversation ended that the son will have to abide to the rules. In the son's mind he thought...it was a good thing that his lover has left him...maybe the mother was right... he was a selfish person, conceited and self-centered
........
There is more to the conversation between the two of them... but if it goes on the list will be endless. All the son wants is to finish his studies and move out, but even when he moves out, he will not neglect the parents because in his heart, he loves his parents just that maybe he had a hard time showing it.
.......
Mom,
I know I may not be the greatest son in the world nor had I every done something really proud...but I truly appreciated what you have done for me and Mom... I really love you and you and always will be the number 1 in my heart. Although sometimes in life... I cannot follow what you want me to do... please understand me.
I know that writing all these in here is meaningless to you... but....
I am so sorry....I really am sorry....
Mother: You don't go upstairs, come down here and tell me what do you want.
The son descending the stairs....
Son: Yes?
Mother: Tell me now what is the standing between both of us?
Son: ..... (keeps quiet)
Mother: You have been rebellious and very rebellious and that I do not know how to teach you. You have become very selfish.
Mother: You have never appreciated what I have given you. Your studies... I do not see you putting effort in your studies at all. Look at it now, its the holidays and I do not see you touching your books. Your cousin's has told and has been through uni life and they say you really need to put the effort in your studies but I do not see you putting the effort in it. All my hard earned money has been invested in your studies.
Mother: You treat me like your enemy now. You could never listen to me and what I told or tried to teach you. You are worst than your sister. It has come to a point whereby I told your sister too that I want to disown you. So tell me... what is that you want? Freedom?
Mother: I think I gave you a lot of freedom. If I wanted to control you I could have easily taken the car away from you. But you are living in my house and I am your guardian and there are rules in this house that you will have to abide too. Now... tell me what else do you want? Total freedom? Do things your own way.
Son: Well... to tell he truth I am sick and tired of being blame for things that I have not done. Like the day you forgot your house keys. You put all the blame on me.
Mother: Well... I did not tell you the whole story... that day... when I was locked out... I needed the toilet properly... I had no where to go and I had to relief under the star fruit tree using plastics to block the view. Have you ever thought you would react the same? When.. the time your dad let the dog off and when you came home the dog ran out of the house did you not get into a fit? Did you not blame it on your dad...?
Son:....(keeps quiet again. Seriously, he does not know how to answer)
Mother: If you have put yourself in my shoes and think of it from a parents point of view. You would see things differently. You go out late into the night. When your cousin were your age they do not do that. Well it worries me...since I know how you drive and they are a lot of bad people out there these days.
Mother: Tell me... since we make each other unhappy. Why not let us just go our separate ways. I will disown you. I do not need a son like this.
........
The story ended when the son said no. The mother said that he should change and not be selfish. She kept insisting that she has done so much for her son and her son has never given back anything. The conversation ended that the son will have to abide to the rules. In the son's mind he thought...it was a good thing that his lover has left him...maybe the mother was right... he was a selfish person, conceited and self-centered
........
There is more to the conversation between the two of them... but if it goes on the list will be endless. All the son wants is to finish his studies and move out, but even when he moves out, he will not neglect the parents because in his heart, he loves his parents just that maybe he had a hard time showing it.
.......
Mom,
I know I may not be the greatest son in the world nor had I every done something really proud...but I truly appreciated what you have done for me and Mom... I really love you and you and always will be the number 1 in my heart. Although sometimes in life... I cannot follow what you want me to do... please understand me.
I know that writing all these in here is meaningless to you... but....
I am so sorry....I really am sorry....
6 comments:
cheer up :) things happen for a reason. im bad at this but i do hope u'll be the same old sweetie pie that i used to know.
Bro, our parents gave birth to us and without them, there won't be us. Disputes and disagreements between parents and children are inevitable. There are also times when I get upset by my parents and I refused to give in. Mend things while it is possible before time drifts everything apart. No child is perfect and neither is there a perfect parent no matter how hard one tries. And there are always 'expectations' from either party.
I may not really understand how it feels like to be in your shoes but I understand that parents always want the best for their children. I think a good talk between parents and a child is necessary to straighten things and create a bond.
All the best, bro!! I know you are a great son and you are trying to be the best you can. One thing for sure, you have always been a great brother to me.
I agree with what Flo mentioned. Indeed no parent nor child is perfect. What is perfect is being able to see the imperfection, and do something about it.
I believe you can pull through this moment Bro. You just have to keep believing in yourself, and putting in some effort in mending the relationship with your parents. All the best, ya? Know that you have at least three person here behind you and supporting you all the way!
jz back from home after my usual o.t, after reading this entry I have "a" short short comment for u before go to sleep:
"it's not too late for you to show ur appreciation toward ur parents, so appreciate for whatever they did for u NOW"
yes i mean started from NOW on, even a lil smile face will lighten up their days
lighten..lightening...which 1 is correct ah?
...whatever...
To all of you guys. Thank you very very much. Lets just say this is a phase and part of my life that I had to go through and as said growing and learning and maturing at the same time. Thank you so much.
Angel: Thank you so much for your undying love and support...hugs and muacks...loves.
Flo: I miss you so much here and I wish you are here right beside me. Che I truly miss you so much it felt like I have not seen you in ages.
Sam: My biggy bro... thank you so much ... for all that you have done for me... I really appreciate me and God gave me a wonderful gift and that gift was you. I am really blessed to have known you within this short period of time. God bless and I will miss you heaps when you are not here in Kuching. Hugs... love ya.
Nth: Tee Heng...you are a great and dear friend to me and I really appreciate you so so much. I thank god to have a friend like you. BFFF. =) When you are not so busy we can come out yum cha.
eh dwin... dun forget me... i heard that fran is back to kch on 9th of august..which make us a perfect time to have a reunion :)
anyway, seems like ur new life not so "sun sun li li". same here either, just hope that u can take a short rest n rest ur mind out.
i know it's hard for u to been trough all this, but... take a deep breath n see around u once more, ur frens' right... sit down n talk too them. U are not too old to cry out in front of them :D (i did that too)
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